The warm, charming and courageous Katia Kelly, champion of authentic Brooklyn and blogger extraordinaire, talks about my novel, my habit of getting priced out of neighborhoods, and developers that build luxury condos on a bed of raw sewage:
"Prosperity occupies the same literary territory as the surreal short stories of George Saunders, where banality shades into horror, yet small acts of human connection create moments of grace inside a soulless bureaucracy."
THE LAST STAND OF MS. BETTY J. WASHINGTON
"Yeah, yOU THINK YOU'RE GOD'S GIFT 'CAUSE YOUR COCK IS LIKE A DONKEY -- SO YOU SAY."
She said COME, she said GOOD GIRL, she said STAY, then she said NO.
She said COME, GOOD GIRL, she said STAY, then she said NO, GET DOWN, she said BAD, she said NO.
She said COME, GOOD GIRL, she said STAY, STAY, STAY, STAY, STAY, she said STAY.
Then she said NO, she said GET DOWN, she said BAD, DROP IT, she said DROP IT, she said DROP IT, she said DROP IT.
THIS JUST IN: One of my favorite cartoonists in all the world is teaching an e-course on writing & drawing comics. This is an amazingly attainable (and affordable!) opportunity to learn from a master, so go check out Summer Pierre's site before registration ends on Jan 4!
"SEVEN QUESTIONS FOR THE WORKING WRITER" GARNERS LIEBSTER AWARD, PERSONAL REVELATIONS NECESSARILY ENSUE /
Thank you to Erin Jourdan who writes MemoirClass.com for nominating me for a Liebster Award! The Liebster was recently created to help bloggers turn their readers on to "new and exciting voices".
Accepting this award means one must:
Reveal 11 interesting facts about yourself (yeah I know, that's a lot).
Answer the questions posed by the blogger who nominated you.
Nominate other new bloggers for the Liebster Award.
Give your nominees a list of questions they have to answer.
SO, THEN...ELEVEN INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT MYSELF
1) "Psychic reader" is a job title I held for a time. 2) I was raised by actors, who bred “the show must go on” mentality into me; so not only would I be capable of telling an anecdote while bleeding profusely from a head wound, I'd be obscurely convinced it was required of me. 3) I’m typical of my astrological sign in most ways: believing in conspiracy theories, having to be dissuaded from the wearing of novelty hats. 4) I would sooner sleep with somebody who had a dungeon in their basement than a someone who owned a selfie stick. 5) I write all my raw material while baked. 6) One of my friends calls me “Math Hamster.” 7) I’ve been a practicing Nicherin Buddhist for 32 years. 8) I’m highly susceptible to earworms, especially when it comes to soft-rock hits of the 1970s. 9) I fundamentally mistrust those who use the phrase “lol.” 10) I fantasize about having one of those Temple Grandin squeezy machines in my living room. 11) No self-control in the presence of cake.
ANSWERS TO THE QUESTIONS MY NOMINATOR POSED:
If you had a magic wand, and you could only use it three times on other people, what would be your three wishes?
Well, a witch once warned me against using magic for love, so I guess I’d wave my wand at Jesus, Mohammed and Buddha to impel them to appear before the human race and make a formal announcement that capitalism is not an especially good look on us.
What was the last book you read that made you think, "this needs to be in the hands of a friend, immediately?"
Station 11 by Emily St. John Mandel.
Who is your coolest friend, and why? Or maybe just the why?
Each of my friends is deeply cool, but if I have to single one out, my friend Sarabelle is a healing prodigy – even as a child, she never wavered from her calling, for which she has both an astonishing natural gift and an impressive education. As salty and punk rock as she is, compassion is her driving force, which is the height of cool.
What do you think you can’t do? You don’t need to state why.
Get over my irrational fear of online dating.
What is a great idea you have, but do not believe you have the means to make a reality?
I spent a year creating the world’s best roommate-matching service, but I couldn’t afford a programmer, dammit.
Give me a recipe for something, it can be food or poetry.
Natalie Eve Garrett has a recipe for cookies that are life-changing. They happen to be vegan and gluten-free, which comes in handy if you have to attend a lesbian potluck, but apart from that, they’re just phenomenal. The recipe was first published here on The Hairpin and I’m sure it’s also in her upcoming Artists’ and Writers’ Cookbook.
MY NOMINATIONS FOR THE NEXT ROUND OF LIEBSTER AWARDS:
Summer Pierre’s PAPER PENCIL LIFE. Pierre's work occupies that fervent, heady, intoxicating space where technical skill is perfectly matched with artistic integrity. Fearless in her vulnerability, thrillingly proliferate, her work grants everything that exists -- from candy wrappers to first love -- its unique existential weight.
The Anne Friedman Weekly. Friedman's newsletter is a perfectly-curated mix of culture, politics and feminism that amuses me, engages me, and keeps me in the loop. It takes a lot of work to produce quality at this level, this consistently, so Friedman has my deepest respect.
Astroberry. Unsparing, emotionally intelligent, and nuanced no-frills weekly horoscopes by Barry Perlman. Super-accurate, no New Age flotsam.
Cake Wrecks. I owe Jen and her crew a debt of gratitude, because no matter how dark the day, a Cake Wrecks post has never failed to make me bark with horrified laughter. Again, the work that must be going on behind the scenes to maintain the quality of this blog is laudable.
MY QUESTIONS, THEN, FOR THE ABOVE NOMINEES, WHO MAY OR MAY NOT ACCEPT THEIR NOMINATION; WE CAN ONLY HOPE:
If you could easily hire someone else to do all your self-promotion, would you, or do would you rather be at the wheel?
Do you feel that your social media presence has an intrinsic affect on your creative process?
What's the approximate gap, if any, between the number of hours you work and the number of hours you get paid for?
Everyone has an apocalypse fantasy. What's yours? (For example, are you sustenance farming? Foraging in the wilderness? Heading a religious cult? Gathering herbs on a gentle commune? Shooting everything in sight?)
Name one song you can never listen to all the way through without singing along at the top of your lungs. Bonus points for quoting the lyrics you sing with special vehemence.
Well, well, well...SEVEN QUESTIONS FOR THE WORKING WRITER has been nominated for a LIEBSTER AWARD, a new award created to turn readers on to "new and exciting voices" in....[Monster Truck voice] THE BLOGOSPHERE. My fellow nominees for this round: LENA DUNHAM & JENNI KONNER'S LENNY LETTER, MIA LIPMAN'S DOTS AND DASHES, JEN BOULDEN'S JENB.TV, AND LADY LIBERTINE BY LAUREN WINDSOR. Now I feel fancy. Many thanks to ERIN JOURDAN for the honor!
According to Arkansas' Lovely County Citizen, I'm the recipient of the 2015 Dairy Hollow Writer's Colony Moondancer Fellowship for Writing About Nature and the Outdoors. As if that assembly of monikers wasn't cute enough, the paper elected to eschew my publicity photo in favor of one from Kim Osborne's awesome Dog Project Brooklyn that features my little guy, whose effect cannot be accurately measured because he breaks all known Cuteometers.